write like you are mortal
because you are
This was perhaps a strange way for this thought to occur to me, but last night I watched Love Actually, and while there were about a dozen storylines to get snagged on, for some reason my mind was fixated on a character we learn almost nothing about: the young mother (Liam Neeson’s wife in the film) who tragically passed away. I think one of the reasons it stuck with me is because it seemed like she had time to plan for her death. She was made aware of her imminent mortality before her life was taken from her… this got me thinking about what I would do in that situation; if I knew my life was going to come to an abrupt and sudden end, early, how would I spend my time? What would I be focused on? What wouldn’t I be focused on?
One thing became clear to me: I would write more. A lot more. I guess that is because externalizing thoughts feels like the ultimate legacy hack (in a way that doesn’t feel at all like a hack, and much more like a way of honouring what exists inside of you). This urge was so sudden, so visceral, so clear, that it nearly sent me out of bed and towards the keyboard in that instant (I used my better judgement and let my thoughts float through that half-conscious space into sleep instead, and picked this thread back up in the morning, as I sit here writing to you).
I pictured how the coming weeks would unfold; I would be writing, a lot. Publishing a lot… maybe every day? (This might be why I am publishing again today, after posting something—rather lengthy—yesterday as well! I mean: what time do I have to waste??) I have so many things I want to say, that I have wanted to say, things that I haven’t said, because, well, I don’t know, I guess I am scared to say them? And when I interrogate that hesitation, those fears, I’m just like: wait, there is nothing here. Not really. This is just empty, unwise, self-protective fluff causing me to waste my precious time on earth, keeping myself from doing what I actually feel called to do! Which is to share, write, express, teach, lead, create more.
It also put other decisions I have been thinking about in perspective, like: a few of my friends are going on a trip in the new year, and a part of me wants to join, because, well, why do any of us want to go on trips with our friends? Because trips with your friends are great! But there is also a deeper, clearer part of me that wants to have as much space as possible in my life right now to focus on doing, creating, and acting on what I am inspired by when I feel inspired, and on doing what feels alive to me when it feels alive.
A client I am working with said that this feels like a year where decades will happen, and he wants to shape his life to be ready to take advantage of the opportunities that will emerge, to make the sacrifices needed to participate in the ripening future emerging in front of us. I tend to agree. What feels most important and urgent right now actually is “my work.” Whatever I am doing here: this expression of what I see, notice, and want to create more of in the world. I truly, deeply believe in the messages I am trying to unearth and express when I sit down to this keyboard and explore what is inside of me.
I found this conclusion that felt so natural, so obvious once I saw it, kind of surprising, though. The conventional wisdom is always like: take the trip! You won’t regret it! Quality time with loved ones! Which is 100% fair. I have never “regretted” time with friends. But there is also a part of me that feels much more deeply called to what it is that I am doing now: this exploring what is inside of me, the expressing it, the actually making things. Especially when I consider my mortality, and what would leave me feeling most satisfied for having spent time on.
So, it turns out that loosely pondering my own mortality after a casual watch of Love Actually (thanks, hollywood) has revealed to me that what I am doing does feel quite aligned, and the only thing I would change is to just do it… faster? And faster isn’t the right word exactly, because it is not that I want to rush what I am doing, but that I want to do it with less fear, less friction, less doubt, less inhibition. I wrote about this recently in make more, care less. But I really want to live it! I want to practice it! So, I guess this is just a declaration of that. This is me saying: if I knew I were going to die sooner (morbid, I know) I would be writing more, creating more, and just doing more of what I am already doing, with less doubt and more focus. That feels like a pretty good place to be, and I am grateful for all of the choices that have lead me here: headed in the right direction, with a few blocks still to clear to allow even more easeful expression and creation to flow through me. I suppose that is my intention for the coming year: to write more, create more, and to live like I am mortal, because I am!
I hope this thought reaches you as a life-force-inducing sentiment and not a dampening one. That is what it feels like to me: a reminder that life is precious, and that it is a privilege to live in a time where you can have ideas and share them and reach other people who resonate with them with just a few clicks and a little bit of time (and courage) put aside for such activities. I would like to live out this belief even more fully than I already do. I hope you join me in sharing your gifts with the world, as well — we need them!
links to learn more about my work:
1-1 Clarity Coaching: figure out what you truly want out of life and start living it. Good time to explore this if you have been thinking about it with new year / fresh start energy available for us to harness!
Men to Kings: 1-1 coaching for men based on the four key masculine archetypes: King, Warrior, Magician, Lover, to create balance, alignment and direction in your life.
Creative Liberation: a virtual course to help you unblock yourself, act on your ideas, and share your gifts/creativity with the world.
related essays: make more, care less, don’t let your ideas rot, unblock your mind. Also find me on Twitter and Tik Tok.
Thank you for supporting Mind Mine’s existence by being a free or paid subscriber. If you feel like upgrading to receive + support more of my writing, you can do so below. Hopefully even MORE writing than usual, as per this post :) 2025 feels like it will be juicy — I’m excited for what will emerge here!
PS - yes, I changed the aesthetic of my substack… a little preview of some more announcements and changes to come soon!
I definitely vibe with this! Few of us are mere weeks/months away from death, but all of us are only some final, finite amount of time away from it, and that's just the way it is! You gotta look at it with clear eyes every day and ask "What will I do with my one wild and precious life?"
For me I'm in the same place you descibe, I know what I want to do, what I need to be doing, and I just need to learn the fuck into it and do it! Do it as much as it can be done!!! Strike while the irons hot! It can be nice to get space from your situation when things are overwhelming and confusing, but when you've got the means, motivation and moxie to lock in then you gotta lock in!
Thank you Isabel for this lovely reflection. Could "wholehearted" be the word you're looking for to describe how you want to approach your work? The idea that I see recurring in your writing is removing barriers between yourself and the work you want to create. "Wholehearted" captures that commitment to focus on what you want without doubt. It's a word that I think about a lot. Happy holidays!